“Look, Myra-Jean, it’s a praying mantis!” I called, all enthusiasm and good-will.
Myra-Jean came over and regarded it. “It’s very large,” she said soberly.
“I know. But it’s harmless, actually. And sweet. Honey!” I called to Mike. “Come see the giant praying mantis on our cherry tomatoes!”
Mike came out. He took a look. “It’s giant, alright.”
“Yup. It’s also a grasshopper.”
I made a face. “Oh.”
“It’s gonna decimate that plant.”
I made a bigger face. “Really? Are you sure?”
He turned to look at me. “Ever heard of locusts?”
“Oh. Right.” I took a step back. and looked at the behemoth with narrowed eyes. “Get him off, please.”
Mike did. No fond farewells. The locust took his trade elsewhere. Gross, gross, gross.