Fertilized all non-succulent plants, front and back, with liquid stuff we bought from plant store. Some kind of fish or seaweed-type fluid. Realized I could’ve saved myself money and just used what comes out of our water filter.
Fertilized succulents with “Cactus Juice.” Asked them each, as I did so, to “grow a little faster.”
Deadheaded salvia plant. The term “deadhead” implies that there are living blooms left behind. Not the case here. Can you deadhead an entire plant? How about an entire garden?
Watered mysterious “stump plant” that has sprouted big green shoots and, yesterday, a spectacular white flower. Every day, a surprise.
Cut back ivy growing along side of house while simultaneously muttering “Get back. Get back. Get back.”
Deadheaded lavender plant. Wondered why it doesn’t look as good as everyone else’s. It’s not supposed to be yellow.
Sighed over dying herb plant. Muttered “who kills rosemary?”
Wondered if all of this talking to myself makes me the “eccentric type” or just crazy.
Watered and fertilized regular lemon tree. I just read that you are not supposed to water citruses near their trunks, but rather around a wide periphery. Same with fertilizing. But it seems counterintuitive. Watered and fertilized around its trunk. Felt like a jerk.
Watered and fertilized the Japanese lemon tree. Listened to the screeching of new mockingbird babies in its branches. Another family has moved in. Unbelievable. It’s an aviary tenement. I am a slumlord. I want to raze the building and put up a stripmall.
Filled bird feeders. I am also a soup kitchen.
Spilled large quantity of fertilizer on muddy patch where tools are kept. The weeds will be spectacular.
Deadheaded unknown flowers near mailbox. Wished they weren’t “so pink.” Threw ends into yard waste.
Contemplated sickly yet still-terrifyingly-toxic oleander tree on property. We think it is dying of an incurable disease. Better it than us.