A two-year-old GIRL, her FATHER, and her MOTHER sit at the breakfast table. Both of the parents looks bleary and disheveled.
MOTHER
So, you’ll be pleased to know I taught Myra-Jean “anus” last night.
FATHER
Great.
GIRL
What’s anus?
MOTHER
I taught you. Remember? The hole your poop comes out of. (To father) I haven’t had the heart to move on to “vulva.”
FATHER
Huh.
GIRL
Does Grandma have an anus?
MOTHER
Yes. (to father) I guess I’m still not convinced.
FATHER
Convinced of what?
MOTHER
Of vulva. It’s always been “vagina.” Why should it change now?
FATHER
But we looked it up in the book. It said they were right. It’s “vulva.”
GIRL
Does Grandpa have an anus?
MOTHER
Yes. (to father) Still, I’d like to check with someone. Like a doctor. Hmmm….
She looks off pensively.
FATHER
What?
MOTHER
I’m wondering if we know any doctors. Do we? Anyone…?
FATHER (drily)
How about our doctor?
MOTHER
Oh. Right.
CHILD
Does Mina have an anus?
MOTHER
Have you guys had breakfast?
And we FADE to black.