A random sampling of things picked up off of the floor after my daughter went to bed:

• Three magnetic letter A’s, all capital, wrapped in a piece of black rubber shelf liner. MJ has declared, on numerous occasions, that the latter is “her favorite toy.”
• Porcupine. Small cat doll.
• Shredded carrot fragments.
• Fire engine floor puzzle. Done at least four times a day for the last week. I want to use it for kindling. I have no fireplace.
• Six pieces of construction paper drawn on just a bit by MJ. All could be re-used. All go to recycling. Too lazy to put them back in art drawer.
• Microscopic plastic pig purchased to replace the larger one that Mina ate. This one is a choking hazard. I am a bad mother.
• Two cloth napkins. They are probably clean, but, because my child likes to take them off of the table and toss them on the floor at random, they will need to be washed. This happens daily. I am killing the planet.
• Several pieces of homemade play-dough, ossified.
• “Rice bowl.” It’s supposed to be a Montessori-style bean box, but I don’t have the right container, so it’s brown rice and Israeli couscous in a mixing bowl. It is also now filled with little toy people that MJ drowned in the grains.
• Many, many pieces of rice and couscous.
• The broom that MJ pulled out to sweep up the above after she spilled it. Never used. By her.
• Four crayons.
• Plastic bowl.
• Plastic purse.
• Plastic cutlery. Too much plastic. I am a bad mom.
• Stuffed rabbit named Lucille. Used to be MJ’s favorite; now eschewed. Should rename it “Velveteen.”
• Large stuffed cat.
• Small red car.
• A diaper. Used.
• Green mardi gras beads. Plastic. See above.
• Two pairs of shoes.
• One pair of pants.
• One bowl of trail mix. All the raisins eaten out of it.
• Three dustpans full of dog hair, sand and food particles.

Now I can have dinner. Couscous, anyone?