WTF?

Anyone who can tell me what this thing is will win an afternoon digging up a monster rose bush with me and my dog. It’s hanging in the “pantry.” Not the rose bush. This:

It’s driving me crazy. What is it? It must do something. Unless a conceptual artist had it fabricated for a laugh. But, as the lady living here before us was about as conceptual as a washcloth, that is most likely not the case.

Here’s the thing. Here’s how my luck works. I will keep it forever, and never learn what it does, and look like a fool. Or, I will throw it in the recycling and then, a day after the trucks come to take it away, I’ll have that “DOH” moment where I realize “Oh, that’s what it was for. What a perfect, eloquent, ingenious object! Too bad it’s gone forever!” and once again, despair.

Why do I bother? The outcome — I’m-a-fool — is predetermined. Still, curiosity wins out…

Anyone?

5 thoughts on “WTF?

  1. Jeff McElroy

    As you have probably surmised by now, I currently have too much time on my hands. After moving from Louisville to Nashville, I’ve decided on a short “vacation” that has become a long vacation thanks to our wonderfully booming economy.
    This has given me lots of time to waste between trying to write songs and eating ramen noodles. Much of that spare time is wasted (literally) on facebook, but as you know, I do find your gardening blog entertaining.
    ANYWAY! getting to my point, I made it my mission to see if I could find out what in hell that is. My first guess was a tie rack, but that doesn’t make sense for a couple of reasons. One, the shape is odd and two, you found it in your pantry. But another thing that clicked through my mind was maybe it was some sort of drying apparatus for female “undergarments”. Again, the pantry thing really rules this out. But on a whim, this led me to some unfortunate internet searches. The word “rack” coupled with any form of a ladies undergarments (nylons, hose, etc) leads one to dark and dangerous places. In particular, avoid “panty hose rack” at ALL costs. My first therapy session begins tomorrow, but I feel the only hope is drugs – legal of course, but I’ll settle for just about anything at this point. These are images that can never be erased! Beware!

    Reply
  2. Pingback: WTF? — Resolved « thumbstumbler

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